Toast to the bestest brother:)

BROTHER'S WEEK: If you have a brother who has made you laugh. Pulled your hair. Stuck up for you. Drove you crazy. Hugged you. Watched you succeed. Saw you fall. Picked you back up. Cheered you on. Made you strong. Can't do without. Copy and paste this to your status...

Bhai - read the above on a friend's status on FB...each word resonates with some memorable moments of growing up in your company...it never would have been as much fun without you...there are so many things on my mind at this moment that I would want to pen down...but words won't do justice to preciousness of the time spent with you...

I have looked up to you all my life..wanted to do everything like you...be a person as good as you are - that's a tough one to match upto...can only say I'm blessed...you have been a strong support and were always there...can't say enough about what it meant to have you next to me during the difficult times - would have given up without you and your love...remember still you said once - can't see you cry like this, I have to fix things for you..and you did help with fixing it all, everytime I was in any problem:))...and yes these good words have nothing to do with my awesome rakhi gift:))...can't stop laughing when I think about those rakhi ka 50 paisa/ek rupaya that you asked me to return when we'd have a fight ..and I would reciprocate by asking you to return my rakhi first;)...

Wish to go back in time and assist you again with your funny (read wierd) experiments...with science, food, cars...OMG everything thinkable or should I say unthinkable...some notable ones for the sake of written records and reading pleasure for those unaware (read Aadyah, Shaurya, if/when we have more kids;) and may be bhauja too):))
1) Your path breaking, oops sorry thermometer breaking experiment: the imported fever thermometer (anything imported was precious those days) that succumbed when subjected to the bubbling boiling water...can never forget the blast, followed by some very unforgettable spankings - the mercury remains were preserved in a test tube for a long long time...you took me down with you..it was all your idea...I never had the brains to think that far:)
2) Your coolest soft drinks: soda drink technology - made from scratch...Orange/Cola Rasna + Baking Powder + Vinegar...do I have your formula right Mr scientist (wonder at times how you missed getting the Nobel prize, my bad - only if I had documented these before)...pure chemistry from books applied in kitchen...we were safe on this one till you would prove the experiment by shaking the mixture in a bottle and spraying/spilling the soda out like opening a champagne to celebrate your success...the mess got us into trouble from mom....
3) Your icecreams: I have had the luxury of having unthinkable flavours of homemade icecream as you believed in using the freezer technology beyond just making ice cubes..though most of the times your icecreams could qualify more as flavoured ice cubes..the ice cream industry felt really insecure during those years...competetion you gave them inspired them to make better ice cream and glad the black current flavours made you accept icecreams are better paid for than made;)
4) Your homemade chocolate - as I type it, can visualise that look still...a thick layer of dalda (turned yellowish due to heating) on top of dark choco powder mixed with milk and frozen to settle ...look - aweful, taste - bitter from chocolate & dalda like from dalda...Recipe - NEVER TRY or TRY at your own risk - Mix sugar, milk, choco powder and dalda, probably in equal quantities and bring the mixture to boil and freeze for mixture to settle - bingo, chocolate ready except all ingredients in an attempt to escape have made their own layers - the ingredients never thought someone could put them through such a traumatic experience! WARNING - keep away from children all age and chocolate loving adults!
5) Your racing tracks: major part of our small single bedroom defence quarters were covered with books, scales and anything with flat surface to make tough racing tracks for the free maggi cars...hours spent on car stunts on those tracks...
6) Your engineer brain: any toy or mechanical item had to be opened to understand the technology..not sure if the technology made any sense but the things could never see light of the day again after your attempts to dismantle them...Rest in peace to all those things!!

The list can go on and on...and so can I...
for this is with love ...for my adorable bhai...

Love you so much...ttttiiiiiiight hug:)

Supper time with a Toddler

Time flies and it has flown for us too. Can’t believe the little peanut will be 2 in about a month…one of a kind character, such a strong personality in the making for someone who was too little to fit in mama and papa’s arm…I can go on and on about the small things that she does every moment…life was never so much fun and entertainment without the tubby teeks-dimpaa teen-rodyy eeps-teet weetheen-turly air-veyi fair-eyechaa bue-oveyee 2-mama’s pet-is that kichuuu-yesh yech yech.

But with every fun thing comes some challenges – nothing’s without a cost. Though this one I would love to pay for – the return on investment (ROI) is very precious to my heart. I will start with saying my toddler is much obedient, follows a defined schedule, very predictable with little bit of tomfoolery or monkey business, which is so part of being a child. At times, I do experience what's better known as "Terrible Twos", but when compared to any average toddler, I certainly have an easy one to handle. Of Course, supper time is a different ball game all together– it can take anything between 5 minutes to more than an hour. And what I have realized over time is, eating or choice of food is not the big problem. It is the mood and more so the idea of sitting at one place with nothing other than the food to explore, that makes her restless. In the past two years, we have learnt a lot as parents too. And what has worked with supper time is how much we could make it fun for her, all she needs in return for the free of cost all day entertainment that she provides.

When we started with more of regular food, I did try different recipes – what was yummmyyyy one day was totally a drag on another… I must admit I’m not very patient especially on days that are crazy at work, so Ajay did well with managing those situations…One thing about Aadyah’s personality is one cannot force her into anything, and mine is I cannot give in very easily…so it was a tiff of personalities when Ajay intervened to explain, probably easier for you to understand and give in than having to get a toddler to see sense;)…I got the message…and it saved us all some unpleasant-noisy-screeching moments and the guilt that followed for making the sweetie cry/scream when I would not let her escape without finishing…Not that the tiffs do not happen anymore – we have our mother-daughter moments, but more than me, Aadyah has learnt the knack of using super nice buttery sweet talks that can get her what she wants…like many other skills, this one comes from dad too;)…A cute “mamaaaaaa all done..ummm..otaayyy mamaaaa” can melt any monster and I am just a mother – so it works…the days when mother’s almost like a monster and would not fall for those sweet gestures, she has the super excuse – “Mamaaaaa peeepeeees”…you just cannot ignore that when you have been quite persistent about “No pee-pee’s in the diaper, we go in the Potty”…and once off the high-chair, there’s never getting back there…

These days every thing has to be done ‘Aapiii’ – i.e. by herself… gives her a sense of achievement – makes her feel special that she could do things independently like older kids or mama/papa…makes her very proud and us too, have to see the look on her face to realize the sense of pride – I guess very common behavior among all toddlers and kids. With supper time, the ‘aappii’ approach can get out of control…first the pace that requires half hour for 3 bites and then the mess that follows…as much as I appreciate my little one eating on her own, there are days I’m crunched on time…more so half hour invested for 3 bites makes my cutie tired and done with her ‘aaapie’ business …enough for her to declare “All done mamaaaa”…so we have customized the ‘aapie’ approach - we take turns…we have each ‘aapie’ turn followed by two bites fed by mummaa;)…that keeps both party’s creative instincts alive…trust me this task indeed involves much of creativity so don’t get surprised by the use of that word;)

Few other things that have worked:
1) Baal Ganesha or Banku (from Bhoothnath fame) story
2) Any other stories involving her and her favorite animals like Monkey jumped from the windows and Kishaa played football with lion…and elephatant whose name was Dondi made a goal…just keep her busy in such conversations and the mouth just opens for the spoon…
3) Side dishes that are mostly junkies like chips, Indian mixture, peanuts…though the most bland food could be complained about as hot/spicy, these spicy junkies with layers of chilli powder are much appreciated…another habit that’s inherited from papa…well ofcourse, Mama made another rule – “one chip one bite” and “No bite, no chip”…kinda tradeoff but works;)
4) Pasta and Sauce served separately so she could pick the floral pastas and do 'dip dip dip' is fun too...one thing I need to try more when I'm a little less crunched on my schedule is get more creative with presenting the food..the little experiments I have done there have worked well:)
5) Pocket mai Rocket hai song from Rocket Singh Salesman of the year is a true saving grace on tough days...

Just thought this experience was worth documenting – the little fun moments to be cherished later;).

Rhymes redefined with Aadyah:)

The dots represent the words that get eaten up in a rush to finish :)..of course it is another level of fun to hear these live with action:) - watch the videos…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nQRaVMzfkw8

Twinkle Twinkle:

Tinkaa tinkaa leeyii taar,
Ow I wandaa watt you aaa,
Up aba wod…hii…litaa diamaa….skiiiiiiii!!

Chubby Cheeks:

tubby teeks, dimpaa teen, rodyy eeps, teet weetheen,
Turly air, veyi fair, eyechaa bue, oveyee 2,
Mama’s pet, is that kichuuu, yesh yech yech!!

Five Little Monkeys:

Phiiive teetle monteeys, dhumpin onaa bayyd
……………………bump head…
mamaa..doterr…
no more monteees dumping onaa bayyydd….!!

Ba Ba Black sheep:

Baaa Baaa Baaaaa theeep..
Haave uuuuuuuu wooooo…
Yech Yech Yech saaa…thee fooo..
One maater…dame..One leeyi boy…
Live attross the yaane…

Machlee Jal ki Raani:

Mathleee dal ki raani hayyy…
Deevan .. pani hey..
Haath aaddao...daa dayedi...
baar..marr daaayedi...!!

Johny Johny-Yes Papa!:

Donyy donny yapappa..
Eetin tudar..no pappa..
Teyyin aayi ..no pappaa..
…mouth…..ha ha ha ha…

London Bridge is Falling Down:

Nondon bidge nondon bidge umm umm …
Fayeein doun Fayeein doun Fayeein doun…
My fayy layee
......ion an tee, ion and tee, ion and tee, ion and tee….
(with a reminder to stop and move forward)…Myeee fayyy layeee…
….bendaaabo…bendaabo..bendabow (another reminder)
…Myeee fayyy layeee…

Pune - The city where it all started for Dubeyz...

I just read the Article by Rajdeep Sardesai ‘An open letter to Uddhav Thackeray’ and would like to thank him for putting his foot forward to question the existence and actions of ‘T’ Company – very rightly called so. I and my husband live in the US – our work brought us here and we look at this arrangement just as our means to live - that doesn’t make us any less of an Indian – felt the need to state that before saying more as really would hate anyone questioning my being an Indian in any which way. Working in the US for me is like my Job taking me to any city in India that is not in the State where my forefathers or parents came from – though what I have not faced here in USA in the last 5-6 years is someone bullying me for not being an American but working here, but ironically I sincerely fear that would have happened long back to me if I were working in Mumbai – it would be less shocking to me if an American citizen questions my existence in their country than my fellow countrymen questioning me if I worked at Mumbai which is very much a part of MY India. I am sick and tired of the debate around ‘who belongs to Mumbai’ and ‘Mumbai belongs to whom’ – it is in my country’s territory and as an average citizen I have every right to live/work in any corner of my nation.

Every time we watch the Indian News channels showing the ‘T’ company initiated mayhem – we wonder don’t they have anything better to do for the country than questioning the integrity and Indian-ness of citizens of India who have made the country proud across the world in many ways, Or generating chaos among peacefully co-existing residents by sowing the seeds of regionalism – the whole ‘me mumbaikar’ debate, Or protesting against people celebrating Valentine’s Day in a country that just celebrated 60 years of being a ‘a sovereign socialist secular democratic republic’. If for them, celebrating love is western influence that is taking our culture away from us, they sure need a reality check – I wonder what advocating violence, threatening innocent people and violating the very principles of democracy does to my country’s culture. What would concern me more is when someone from outside claims part of my nation (read Kashmir) and spreads terror taking away thousands of innocent lives – if today we do not take a united stand to fight against the cruelty, tomorrow that could be the life of someone I love and grew up with.

The recent blast at German Bakery in Pune has left us shaken. This city always reminded me of some beautiful moments of my life few years back – of the times when I fell in love with my husband, when we moved to this city right after our marriage – set up our first home – nothing less than an extended Honeymoon is what we remember those three months as, every weekend was about visiting Inox or eSquare for the 10 m show. In the absence of a fully equipped kitchen at home, it never took us much to decide it dinner would be at a locale hotel in the neighborhood or a drive to the authentic bengali ‘fish-rice-mutton thali’ place across the street from e-square – I can bet this food could give any five star menu run for their money. Not to forget about our means to drive those days - had put in Rs. 600 to fix a close friend’s bike who was on a US trip those days and was kind as always to let us use his bike if we could get it to run. Those were times when friends could barge into each others place and lie there all day talking, eating and doing nothing; still fresh in my memory is that evening when I and Ajay were taking a stroll in Aundh area, and my funny friend stopped asking us for the keys to our flat so she could respond to an urgent nature call (I was foolish enough to waste time in asking why she was in such a rush, and my husband promptly intervened with a smile on his face “you don’t ask questions in these situations, just give her the keys immediately”). And then those countless trekking trips – I think I was made to climb anything that remotely looked like a hill around Pune – within few months, the lazy me had had a little too much of trekking and the group had started calling me the avid trekker for trying too hard to sabotage every upcoming trek plans. Then there were those great team parties, weekend cricket games (I would have preferred not to mention the cricket part and my skills there, but what I could not have missed were the breakfast options that followed) - always so much fun to be around those great & enthusiastic friends - Pune is all about our fun memories, the place my husband always wanted to settle down till I sold him Bhubaneswar (Orissa) as an option that would keep us closer to our parents.

Pune also reminds me of days when a phone call into each other could decide where our next supper would be – sadly today – I would be scared to do that, my close friends still reside here and I would not want my friends to be anywhere close to places where possibly a German Bakery incident could reoccur. Anyone who has been to Pune would know Singhgarh – my husband is an obsessive admirer of this place and it is difficult to mention how many times he might have visited the fort. One visit that stood out was when he trekked late evening to spend the night at the peak all by himself under the sky – I could call him weird but I always liked his weirdness. Though if he tells me he would do that today, I would be scared to death to let him go alone in the night and do something even much less weird than that. Such is the effect these unfortunate terror attacks have on an average resident, of once popular city now under the clouds of terror threats.

My connection with Pune through some great memories have been shattered by what happened at the German Bakery. The ‘My Name is Khan’ controversy created by Sena was fresh on news channels when the German Bakery blast news and stories about how it changed lives of families impacted shook us all. The first thing my husband said to this was could the ‘Thackerays’ not use their so called power and Sena troops to fight against the terror attacks – be it 26/11 or German Bakery and do something more constructive than sending their people to burn SRK posters or disrupt MNIK shows at theatres or beat up innocent youngsters celebrating V day. We as citizens hardly loose an opportunity to find faults with the ruling Government and blatantly hold them responsible for mishaps caused due to loopholes in our security system – to an extent the Government holds responsibility but as citizens we do too and before we have done our part we do not deserve the right to point fingers.

‘T’ Company: The so called Protectors of Maharashtra and Mumbai, claiming to do everything in the interest of this state/city – for once can you work towards issues that would make Mumbai/Pune or any other place in the country a safer place to live in – can you use your energy, philosophy and power for the betterment of this country and come up with some constructive ways to satiate your hunger for Power – never forget that a democracy is ‘of the people, by the people, for the people’ – so win people by your actions – what you are doing will only take away their faith from the ideologies you are advocating. While it is important to save our culture, it is more important to save our nation – besides ask your conscience if the propaganda around preserving our culture is really what you want or is it the desire to rule Maharashtra that makes you send your army to disrupt the lives of common and good Indian citizens. Please help towards solving the real challenges the country is facing than creating more challenges for it – this message is not just for the ‘T’ company but for every such group that exists within India and claims that their actions are for our country’s betterment, please revisit your agenda and make sure your actions really bring good to the country. I have lived across many states of my nation and each brings back some awesome memories – I would hate to see any place declared unsafe due to the spreading terrorism –I want to see India as a country that the world could consider as a safe and peaceful place represented by nice, good hearted and friendly people. I have a 16 month old daughter who is the center of our lives – she has an US citizenship by virtue of being born here. As she grows up, I want her to know India as a safe and progressive country, I want her to hear about India for its outstanding positive achievements on the News channels. As the years pass, I want her to know how beautiful My country is – I want her to come to me and say some day – Mumma, I want to go and spend the rest of my life working for MY country – I want her to have as much conviction as I had years back when she sings “Saare jahan se acchhaaa Hindustan humara” – I am living with the hope to witness this dream coming true for every Indian parent.

Heartfelt condolences to the bereaved families of German Bakery tragedy.

On being the 'Lazy' Dubeyz...

I don’t need anyone to testify the association of the word ‘Lazy’ with Dubeyz when the delay in bringing the 2nd post in this space speaks volumes about it? We call this space ‘Prime time with Dubeyz’ – please tell me which prime time channel has slacked as brilliantly as we have – did we just register ourselves into Guinness Book of world records for the longest gap between two posts in Blog Spot by any author…or do we have better bloggers or should I say lazier bloggers claiming the record?

Well Dubeyz are lazy in many ways and not just blogging…and the reason I picked this topic over others as the first post of 2010 is solely because we are trying to get better – trying to lead a more disciplined life going forward…well you have certainly heard about the New year resolutions, right…this is ours for the world to know:-). If we comeback in 2011 (may be) with the next post, we will prove once again resolutions are meant to be broken – I so not want that to happen….and yes some relief is we have improved to an extent last year and there is scope for more but certainly we all are working towards that…My 14 month old is the most sincere of the three:-)…

Well, trying to remember when did we first realize that 'it could just be because we are lazy– are we?' – tell us if you experience such feelings too – if yes – you need to call out some resolution – still not late for 2010 my friend. When Aj has to do the dishes – the thought ‘What’s the big deal if this is done tomorrow’ never fails to cross his mind, When I have to do anything around the house, very first thought crossing my mind is ‘can I not blame Aj for this not being where it should be and have him fix it while I catch up on some sleep – there could never be enough of that for me’....there’s much more to the list than can be ever documented or let me be frank and accept that I am too lazy to type that all….

And just as I was typing that last sentence about being lazy about typing, God heard me and sent my then 14 month old asking for some immediate attention - here I am back to finish writing about my being lazy philosophy after a month or may be more - the little one is 16 months now – yes time’s flying in 2010 – writing this while taking a break from my 8 am to 8 pm all day long session that I have been in for the 3rd consecutive day - one more day to go and would hopefully the lazy side in me gets a real break.

Coming back to being lazy – well things sure look very positive in 2010 – I can say this because we have been very diligently practicing the resolution – and touch wood – so far so good. Would still rate my little angel as the most sincere of the three – can you believe a 16 month old making sure her toys are in the right place and cleaning up her play area before going to bed – and even when you don’t tell her, she would still run back to drop the ball in her toy basket as against throwing it on the floor when she’s done playing with it. Every little piece of anything on the floor/carpet that looks unfamiliar or should not be on the floor is trash for her – she would promptly bring that to you and tell you ‘tayyshhh’…whether or not you could see what she is handing over to you as ‘Tayyshhh’ – you have to get up and pretend that you put it in the trashcan – she makes sure we are on our toes all the time – hence yes – she is our ‘keep it clean’ program manager. Would rate myself next in the list – task that could get me higher ratings than Ajay was folding the laundry on the same day no matter how tired I feel or how late in the night it is – PS: folding laundry is something I strongly detest - trying very hard to keep up with this – trust me the closet looks so good with all the nicely folded, stacked up cloths – though makes me think I have too many cloths, some that I don’t need/use anymore – adds to another big task of sorting those and dropping at donation boxes for people who would fit in – Aj tells me ‘I am too big for them’ – yes that’s where he lost another point for telling a lady she’s FAT – that’s not polite – and yes, that gets him the well deserved title of ‘Slacker Dubey’.

We can always use our busy schedule as an excuse for not doing the right things at the right time – trust me it is very much an valid excuse but then I see others around me who are equally or may be busier than we are but still doing great at balancing work and life – and what I have learnt over the period is after all ‘Not being lazy’ is not that difficult – more so a little of not being lazy can get you so much of liberty for being lazy when you really need to be – well as strange as that may sound, it is true that bringing discipline in our lives gives us so much more time to do things that we do not feel lazy about doing – think about a weekend where you do not have to think about housekeeping activities because you just were so good at doing all of that in small chunks over the week – that was so much less effort and so much more satisfying – If I could finish up cleaning the mess and doing those 2-3 dishes right after dinner every night – I would not have a huge pile of same waiting to greet me on a warm sunny weekend morning that I would look to spend doing anything but the gross dish cleaning task. Just a very basic example of what could ruin a beautiful day of your life and the more such things on your to-do list, the worse it gets. I and Aj have spent so many days of our life arguing about who is behind the mess that it was high time we acted towards leaving that mess behind us once and for all.

It is funny that when I read what I have written above, it makes me feel “were we as messy as I made it appear?” – well Aj says I have a habit of exaggerating things and to an extent I agree – If you have visited our home – you probably could rate it at 6 or 7 on a scale of 10 overall - the point I was trying to emphasize more is though we could keep up with it ultimately, I feel we were trying very hard when we could have managed much easily (and efficiently) if there was a little more discipline in our daily routine. I do not want to run around cleaning my space right when friends call to tell they are stopping by – I want friends to stop by anytime and find it clean, I do not want a night out trying to make my space look pretty for a party next day – I want my space to look pretty right after having a crazy party, all ready to have the next one. Not being lazy not only brings delight overall but it is also very gratifying to see my little one learning and practicing the right habits at this young age – she never fails to impress and inspire us with her little antics.